The lessons we have been learning since our Little Bear arrived are endless. If you are about to be a new parent- get ready. As My Love recently said, "I still feel like I am learning more about being a parent everyday." and its so true. Not only do we feel like we are learning more about how to be a good parent...even more patience, more love, more selflessness, etc. But we are also learning more about ourselves just in general.
As many know, before Little Bear arrived I was quite the busy bee. Happy hour after work! Nails done! Dinner with friends! Exercise! Movie with My Love! Museums and going out on the weekends! Travel! My life was kind of nuts really. But I am a bit of a go-getter and love to do things so its always been normal to me. I tried to mentally prepare myself for Little Bears arrival. I KNEW things were going to slow down and change, but I assumed we'd still go out and about to do some small things. OH how I was mistaken. The first two weeks were so tough for me, I was having a wonderful time with my boys but my life just consisted of daycare - hour commute - work - hour commute - daycare - dinner and chores - bed routine - pass out. This was not the life I was ready for. This was not how I planned to live with my family. Not the kind of Belle-Mére I wanted to be. I knew there would be more responsibilities, but where was the FUN part? I was just exhausted and frustrated most of the time. However God told us to "be
more patient" and "be
more loving". Hence when I began one of my biggest lessons, one I continue to learn almost everyday- The Art of Slowing Down.
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| Daddy reading his book from when he was little to our Little Bear. Dying. |
Not only did Little Bear come from a place where they weren't busy doing activities outside the home very often, but he's going through a HUGE transition. His entire little 2 year old life has been turned upside down and around. Jesus was right to tell me to stick to our new routine for 2 weeks, teach him our way of doing things, teach him he is secure and loved in this place with us. Slowly slowly we began to do more things after work, and more small adventures on the weekends. Nothing for more then 2 hours because he just couldn't handle it, and nothing that took him off his sleeping and eating routine. Gosh was it hard for this Belle-Mére. I felt like I was missing things, in fact I DID miss things with friends, co-workers, and family. My life has completely changed. No more happy hour whenever I want to. No more weekend adventures to go out with friends. But you know what I've found? I'm not really missing anything. Everyone I want to love and grow with are right in my tiny apartment. I am not missing anything if I am loving and serving my own. Plus, things with children are just
slower. Simply walking out and getting into the car in the morning is now a 15 minute adventure that involves noting all of the rocks and bugs found. Saying good bye to "Fella" my dog. Running a race down the corridor. Hopping in and out of the car. Getting crackers and juice to eat for on the way to daycare. Getting out the door is just slower now, and I am finally getting used to it. I am finally even, dare I say, liking it? All of the running around I do all day, when I finally get time with My Boys they force me to just stop. And take a 15 minute adventure just to get into the car.
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| Summer music festivals in the park |
I am happy to say all of this slow dancing has changed us all for the better. Our Little Bear turned a major corner yesterday when after daycare on our way home he said,
"I don wanna go home". WHAT?! From the kid who spends 45min at the beach and wants to go home? Who cried at the zoo because he wanted to go home after an hour? The kid who wants to play on my phone at a music festival instead of play with bubbles and dance and play with other kids? WHAT?! So I asked if he wanted to go to the farmers market with me, and we had a blast! And last weekend we spent THREE hours at the beach! I want to shout, "its working! its working!" because we are so proud of him. And for this Belle-Mére, she is changing to be someone who stops to have adventures on the way to the car in the morning. Stops frantically cleaning and making dinner to play monsters and hide under the blankets for awhile. And stops bustling enough to enjoy the sweet moments with her precious loves even if it means being cooped up in the little apartment sometimes.
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| I really do. |
See how much you are teaching us Little Bear? You are our precious blessing. This week I loved it when I caught you singing Old MacDonald in your bed and you didn't want to get up. When you see letters anywhere and say, "look! its L-M-N-O-P!". We laugh when you come out in the morning or after a rest in nothing but your diaper and cowboy boots (or crocs). You are so brave when you swim now, jumping off the sides into our arms and swimming from Daddy to me and back. "swim! swim! swim! I swim like a fish!" you say. When you talk to "Fella" all the time in the kind gentle voice you reserve for babies and animals. You showed her your train today and told her allllll about it. Most days you feed her the food you "cooked" and claim she's the one who bought you your cowboy boots. I've never seen remorse like when you accidentally jumped near the baby today in the pool and made her cry, "I made a baby cry? I sorry". I can not talk about how much you love the beach, you ask to go almost everyday and pretend your toys are going to the beach all the time. The water is a bit too cold for you, but the sand and birds keep you pretty busy. When we are being funny you say, "silly goose!" which is what my Momma always used to say to us too. We notice how I have become your comforter and "supplier" of any necessities, while Daddy is your protector and the one you get to giggle and play rough with. These are the roles you've given us, and we are happy to play them. We are so lucky to get to love you.
xoxo
Belle-Mére
